welcome to alvic's world

A Letter from an SO to his Loved One

2007-10-26T20:56:00.000+09:00

Hello there! It's been a while since we've last saw each other. We're still in our pre-soloing stage that we are not allowed to go out on passes. I miss the way we get excited at the end of the day knowing that we'll see each other and have dinner together. Here, we don't even have enough time to enjoy our breakfast, lunch and dinner because we are not yet privileged to use bikes going to and from our quarters and the stagehouse. But it's okay... we enjoy the company of everyone while we're at it.

Love, live at the stagehouse is a mix of sugar and spice, of bitter and sweet memories. Our day starts at dawn before sunrise and ends way after the sun sets in the afternoon. Imagine that, it is still dark when we enter the stagehouse, and when we leave it, it's already dark! That's why I miss those times when we were walking together, hands holding each other under the sun. I miss the sun, love. and you know, before entering the Flying School, I loved looking at the stars at night. But now, all the stars I'm seeing are those stars generated from every offense we do here... big or small (one star amounts to ten pesos).

But not all things at the station is bad. Here, we learn how to fly planes. That's a reward in itself already. We read lots of books about aviation, aircraft systems and other interesting things. I just wish that they don't expect us to be like computers. We cannot process and recall that much information in one sitting.

I am looking forward to us seeing each other

Slow Flight

2007-10-14T10:14:00.000+09:00

In our flight training, there is a maneuver we call "Slow Flight" wherein the airplane, known for its speed, travels through the air below its required cruising air speed limitations. To discuss this in technical terms would not only be boring, but it will be disinteresting and alien to the common ear.

However, I could explain this so-called Slow Flight maneuver in simpler terms.

Normally, the airplane, while flying maintains a straight and level "attitude" (meaning it is travelling horizontally through the air), with a corresponding "power" setting which pushes the plane forward. When you change the attitude or the power setting of the airplane, naturally it cannot maintain its straight path. Either it will ascend or descend, depending on where it's nose is pointing.

But in slow flight, adjusting your pitch attitude in the right position (which is pitching up), even if the power setting is below the required settings, the airplane can still maintain a straight and level flight.

Come to think of it... with the right "attitude", coupled with the right "power" setting, you can still perform feats beyond your limitations. Walking head high (like the high pitch up of the airplane) eventhough you're walking slow will still get you there.

As they always say... ATTITUDE + POWER = PERFORMANCE

My First Flight

2007-10-13T17:05:00.000+09:00

Who would think that a once happy-go-lucky guy like me can be here right now, learning how to fly planes? I wouldn't think of myself as like that neither. But here I am, wearing a white undershirt soaked in my own perspiration, under a blue flying suit still without patches (patches of the flying unit are placed after you have had your first solo flight), still feeling shocked about the fact that my flight didn't turned out the way I had expected it, but also feeling excited about what's in store for me as a pilot.

I am a mountaineer, also a scuba diver. By that, I can say to myself that I've already conquered land and sea... and I'm on my first steps in conquering the skies! It feels good to be up there, like experiencing the freedom of the birds. And I think everyone deserves a taste of the air up there.

*My first flight is for my polar bear :)

Wings

2007-09-20T07:34:00.001+09:00

Wings
Originally uploaded by kadete

Every wannabe pilot's (military pilot for that matter) dream is to have a badge like this pinned on his left chest.

Death of a Comrade

2007-09-09T23:59:00.001+09:00

The death of 2Lt Ariel Toledo of the Philippine Air Force is an event full of emotions and feelings. For one, I had mixed emotions of sorrow, regret, as well as happiness.

I could not remember a funeral I have attended that I cried. It does not mean I don't feel the sadness of losing my love ones, but I just don't want to dwell on the idea that I had lost someone... that's too selfish of me. Rather, I would like to think that all the sufferings that person is experiencing while he/she was living is finally over. I would like to think that that person doesn't want to see us crying for their "loss", rather I would like to remember those happy moments each and everyone experienced with that person. Hence, laughter not tears.

Anyway, the death of my 'mistah' made me rethink some things about life -- when it will cease, what's really important, how would other people remember me -- things like that. But most importantly, I thought how precious life's moments should be treasured, and every encounter with a friend, even with an enemy, should become a learning experience.

Ariel's journey is now over, ours' still continuing. Let us take Ariel's death not as a loss, but let us gain from it by living our lives to its fullest and appreciating each and every moment with each other.

I salute you, mistah.

PAFFS Seal

2007-09-07T00:45:00.001+09:00

PAFFS Seal
Originally uploaded by kadete

Maybe you would ask after a very long time of silence, here I am, posting a patch of some kind, here in my blog. It has been more than a year since I had the 'chance' to post something... at least a meaningful one... for everyone's consumption.

A lot has happened this year. For one, I have been a 'public servant' for more than 16 months now. Being one is not a joke... yes we are being paid by the taxes that every honest (not to mention those who are not) taxpayer pays, but the work we do, at least in principle, does not seem to balance well. Also, I have found someone who takes care of me and I also want to take care of all my life. The past 366 days had its ups and downs... but it was well worth it because I had the chance to understand and realized the feeling that most people call "Love".

So, this is the start of yet another phase in my life. Like the seal I posted here, it says "Philippine Air Force Flying School". Yes, I am now in Lipa... not in Quezon City nor La Union where I used to wake up every morning and eat breakfast with a lot of "muta" in my eyes. And Yes, I am currently a "Student Officer" (as what they call us here) in the PAFFS. We are here to learn how to fly planes, and we all expect that this will require a lot of hardwork and patience from us. And that, I intend to do... strive hard and be patient.

They say that entering Flying School is the junction/crossroad in being a military officer of the PAF. Eventhough I do not buy that idea, it seems to be true to a majority of officers here. Being a pilot is, of course, a privilege in the ladder to superiority. But being one doesn't ensure someone to be a good officer and a gentleman. It depends really on the person's values and good upbringing, which...

Brings me to one thought... Good upbringing of parents are crucial and very important to the development of our country as a whole. Hmmnn.... from PAFFS to good upbringing is a long shot, but hey... it does make sense, right?

:::::::::::::

2006-06-20T03:29:00.000+09:00

Hello there! It seems that everytime I post something here it's like, "It's been a long time", or "Since my last post"... I am sorry I really haven't had the time to post entries regularly... but for your information, I am trying.

Anyway, a piece of my mind... I really, really envy those people who could just type away their thoughts on their blogs... First of all, I don't have the power of words to do that right now. Tapos, I am not ready "emotionally" to divulge that easily my true thoughts because of certain factors. I hope I was that strong like the others.

The Perfect Chair

2006-05-13T02:09:00.000+09:00

P1000767
Originally uploaded by kadete.

...massage chair
...cable television
...small ref(with cold beer inside)
...air conditioned room

what more could you ask for!

finally home!!!

2006-04-30T09:57:00.000+09:00

After a year in Baguio and 5 years in Japan, I am finally back in Manila! Too many stories to tell.. too little time. All I can say right now is, I'm so happy I'm back!

after a long time of silence

2006-01-31T22:51:00.000+09:00

I'm alive again! A lot of things happened during the last four months... four months! I never thought that I would be silent for that long. But anyway, I'm here, and I'm back.

Hmmn... what happened to me the last four months will be a long story and boring story to tell 'coz, as I had written here before, I'm a cadet... and the life of a cadet is all Routine. But aside from all the routine, there were some good things that happened too. I was home for Christmas and New Year after five long years of spending the holidays alone. I was in a major heart break, too. But now, I am recovering... and maybe standing again on my feet soon.

All that matters to me now is NOW. It's good to be back.

Lola Aning 1908-2005

2005-09-22T22:00:00.000+09:00

A sad day for me. Lola Aning joined our Creator this afternoon.

I remember when I was a kid, I used to spend most of my summer vacations in the "Big House" in Aringay. Even without the conveniences of city life, I had everything I needed in the province... good food, peaceful surroundings, loving family.

Here lived Lola Aning. She was the town doctor. She finished medicine at the University of the Philippines and since graduation, practiced medicine in her little clinic at the Big House. People from all walks of life were her patients... from the town officials to the simple farmers and tricycle drivers. She never received financial payments but her patients "pay" her with fruits, vegetables or anything they can afford to give.

She was my Lola. She is my inspiration. Before I went to Japan, she told me that she would like to see me graduate with flying colors from the Academy. She promised me that. There was even a time when her health was near collapsing, I visited her and she said to me with all efforts, "Diba I told you I will wait for your graduation? I'm still here."

Now her body fell, but not her soul. I can still feel her presence everywhere. I can still hear her say, "I'm still here." And I am sure that she will be there, present, in my graduation.

Lola Aning, in a little more than 6 months, I will grant your wish to see me graduate the Academy with flying colors. This, I promise you, as you had promised to wait for me and be there at my graduation.

Till then.

bunny

2005-09-20T22:57:00.000+09:00

bunny
Originally uploaded by kadete.

There are times when you wanted to hold on to something but you also feel the need to let go. Life is full of choices like this. Take for example a stuffed toy you used to keep. You just like to hold it close to you all the time, but in maturity we have to give way to other things that really matter to you, or things that you really need.

I've held this bunny for a long time (well, actually, it's a teddy bear... i just want to call it bunny). And now, I've learned to let go. I just hope that I made the right decision.

My English Suck!

2005-09-01T21:31:00.000+09:00

Aaarrgghh!!! Hindi na ako marunong magEnglish! I had this realization just before I wrote this blog entry. I was intending to post about my long absence here and my short stay in the Philippines but I was at a loss for words. I didn't know how to start or what to write. I had to look for some ideas from other blogs out there, pero reading them makes me more... makes me more... aarrghh!!!.. I don't even know the word for it! Would someone teach me English again, please.

********************

Well, we had our summer break... and this year's summer break was, so far, the longest break I ever had in the Academy. I was in the Philippines from 01 August until the 26th. But here's the catch... two weeks of that were spent entertaining my Japanese classmates and my foster parents in Japan. which leaves me only a little more than a week to do my own business like giving courtesy calls to people who have short hair and have stars or suns on their shoulders, or just hang out with friends.

We (with the Japanese) scuba dived in Batangas, did a little firing in Baguio, toured historical sites in Manila and Baguio (of course, PMA) and had a picnic in Tagaytay overlooking Taal Volcano. And before they went back to Japan, guess what, I made them eat... Balot & Durian!!! And to my surprise, most of them liked it! (except maybe for the smell of the durian and the stare of that poor little duck...iieeww) Mama loved the way those Japanese reacted when they saw the Balot.

I had a lot of fun naman eh. Siguro, it's one of my excuses para lang makagimik. I just wish I had more time...

Philippine Cadet on Japanese Soil (Part 6)

2005-08-01T21:50:00.000+09:00

It was the first time I saw the Philippine flag flying side by side with the Japanese Flag.

It was the day when the Deputy Chief-of-Staff of the AFP went to visit to the National Defense Academy. I was called upon the request of Gen. Adan, to join the welcoming party prepared by the Academy. I had classes then and after a series of requests to the professors and some paperworks, I was allowed to skip my classes at that time.

They arrived in black cars with blue diplomatic plates. We were standing in front of the Main Building (picture above) and welcomed their party. The president of the Academy was on my side when they shook hands.

Of course I was very nervous... but also happy to see a Filipino face. They showed him around, took some pictures, chatted.... the normal thingie.

I had to leave every now and then to attend to some of my duties as a cadet and it was very tiring. Imagine going back and forth to the barracks, the classrooms, to the mess hall (canteen), and the Main Building.

But it was worth it... for I saw my Flag flying side-by-side with the Japanese flag. I was proud to be a Filipino.

I'm back from training

2005-07-23T21:46:00.000+09:00

I've been gone for about 20 days for a training. I was in Chitose Air Base the first 10 days (which is in Hokkaido, northern Japan) and after that went to Hofu Air Base on the last part of my training. So I came from a very cold place (average temp 14 degrees) to a very hot place (the humidity killed me!). It's like riding a taxi with a strong aircon and then going down at noon in the center of the dessert (exag)...

It was not actually a flight or pilot training. We were just given the chance to ride as a backseat driver of a training plane (T-7) used by soon to be pilots in the Japan Self Defense Force. It was like riding a roller coaster..that is, you have the controls..eheheh. It was a hell of a ride... we did loops, intentional stalls, acrobatics and other stuff. Normally, the maximum G would be just about 4G but at that time, I had a maximum of 5.2Gs! Cool!

I will go home this August and will be riding a commercial plane. I wish they would do some acrobats at that time... ehehhe ;)

back from the operating table

2005-06-10T15:54:00.000+09:00

Finally, I had a long overdue operation in my right shoulder last June 2 at SDF Yokosuka Hospital. It was a 5-hour operation and I was in full-body anesthesia. I've heard that they had done the "Brissow" method and put a screw in my shoulder. I was required to stay in the hospital for at least two weeks but... i can't afford to be behind in my academics here so I requested the doctor to let me go home after just one week. Well, I was able to convince him to let me go home... but the wound was still fresh, and it was painful. I had to take pain killers three times a day after meals, but the effect of the pain killers only last for several hours; meaning I had to endure the pain from midnight until I wake up in the morning (that is... if I can sleep!). The nights are so long and painful and the days are worse coz I can't use my right arm.

Now, I'm on my 9th day and the wound is healing. They will remove the stiches (actually, stalplers... if you will look in the picture closely) on the 14th and I still have to immobilize my right arm for a week after that. Then my 2-3 months rehabilitation starts.

***************

Sorry for my long absence... I was busy fixing my heart.

Philippine Cadet on Japanese Soil (Part 5)

2005-04-19T09:33:00.000+09:00

"Taiban"
It's but natural to be at a loss when you enter a new environment. And at those times, you wish that there's someone who would guide you thru everything. That is a "Taiban".

To someone familiar with the cadet's lingo in PMA, a taiban would correspond to a Buddy, a second year who teaches the basics of cadet life to a first year.

"Tai" means "corresponding" and "Ban" means "number". This seems senseless but when you take a quick look at the history of my Academy, there was a time when all the cadets of a company stays in the same room. On the rightmost part of the room, aligned are the desks of the fourth years and going to the left, the desks of the third years, second years and the freshmen. These desks are numbered and the upperclass with the number "1" in their desks are in charge of the underclassmen which has the same corresponding number "1". Hence the word "Taiban" or "corresponding number.

The Taiban system does not only apply inside the Academy but also after graduation. The taiban tree is one of the bonds that are formed during your stay here. And I may say, a strong bond.

To my upperclass taiban, Lt. Maeno, my underclass taibans, Cadet Yamamoto and former Cadet Kawasaki, to Cdt Yamamoto's underclass taiban, Cadet Kugimiya, and his taiban, let the legacy of our taiban tree live for as long as eternity.

boring life

2005-04-18T20:55:00.000+09:00

Kanina, habang nakatunganga ako during class, naisip ko how boring my life is right now as compared to my past life (which was... before I entered the Academy). I went to classes in shorts, tshirt and slippers (hindi ako papapasukin nito sa $#&'"%&), didn't cut my hair until it became long, err...big, and I didn't care what others would say or think about me. Been drunk going to class, seen strange, naked guys running around the campus, and held in my hands a lot of blood (not what you're thinking..."blood letting"). Been in the mountains and been at sea. Ngayon, my day starts and ends with a bugle, wear same clothing all year round, and should stay inside campus all week days. Buti pa ang preso, nabibisita.

**************

Sana marunong akong magdrawing.

**************

When I went to the doctor last month to have my lower back checked, it turned out that it was okay but when the doctor saw my medical history records, he was surprised on how many times my right shoulder was dislocated. To cut the story short, he suggested that I should be operated as soon as possibe and it will probably be this May. Hope it heals in time for our training season.

Philippine Food

2005-04-17T21:42:00.000+09:00

I took this picture when I went home from vacation with my Japanese upperclass. I made them eat a lot of Philippine foods... especially those weird ones. (The balot was a classic.. ehehe)

Sigh... I miss my mama's cooking.
*****************

When I saw this, sabi ko, "Eto na!". I was searching for a good PDA for almost two years and I finally found it.
****************
Spring na dito... winter is over. The weather is perfect!

hmmnn....

2005-04-02T13:46:00.000+09:00

What to write... what to write...
I'm starting to run out of things to write. I'm not one of the creative one's that can express thier thoughts and feelings in words, nor am I not one of those who express their thoughts readily.
What to write... what to write...
I envy those others who have the gift of pen.

******************

Recently, I became a fourth year (a first-class cadet) here in the Academy. We are the so-called "gods" and we rule the corps of cadets. I thought it was heaven, but it's not. Lot's of things to do, aside from lots of things to think about. But I'm getting the hang of it... being a "god" isn't that bad ;)

*******************

This years blooming of the Cherry Blossom is late. Usually, it blooms in the first week of April but it doesn't. Winter also was delayed and ended late. Maybe this is an effect of the much feared Global Warming. Thanks to technology.

*******************

One year to go...

Silent Snow

2005-03-16T10:59:00.000+09:00

click picture first

I wish I could just float like her in the air

You could see the loneliness and emptiness in her eyes

The soft and silent snow breezing with her in the wind

But eyes around her seems to gaze as she looks upon the sky

I wish I could make her smile

I wish I could hold her hand and float together

And together we will go down to pick the flowers

And smell its fragrance forever

- K -

Life Sucks

2005-03-14T20:04:00.000+09:00

...have you ever been in a situation wherein other people look at you in envy for what you have, and yet, you envy them for what they don't have?

...have you ever been in a situation wherein you fell in love with a person who had already fallen out of love for you?

...have you ever been in a place where everyone wants to be... except you?

...have you ever been searching for something but you are too busy searching it that it had passed you already?

...have you ever been loved but you cannot reciprocate it?

...have you ever been in a situation wherein you wanted to cry, but you can't coz other people expect you won't and they are looking?

...have you ever wanted to reach out for something you can see and yet, you cannot touch?

Sometimes in life, these things happen as if it had a purpose. I guess they just happen, plain and simple.

It's in how we react which makes the difference. Ikaw? How would you?

Reminiscing

2005-03-13T23:41:00.000+09:00

I was once a mountaineer.

I once wore ankle and wrist bands, once attempted to grow my hair long (but it didn't get long... it got big!), once had a backpack which, when fully loaded, weighed more than one-third of my weight. I once wore hiking boots, "mojos" (not the potato food), sometimes a bandana on my top, and a lot of things dangling in my neck (dog tag, utility knife, flashlight, whistle).

I once sang songs of the Eraserheads while waking along the trail, reaching the hands of the one behind me and sometimes reaching out for the hand in my front, slid and slipped a thousand times in mud, stone and grass.

I once told scary ghost stories to everyone during frolics at night, gotten bit by mosquitoes as big as it can be, looked up on the unusually many stars at night, and listened to the music of the woods.

People ask me, "Why the hell do you climb mountains?". They say it's just a waste of money, time and energy. It's true that you spend some money for climbing. Of course you also get tired. But what they don't understand is the feeling of accomplishment, freedom and the feeling of being on top of everything after you slipped, fall, or in some instances, fall while climbing.

Well, this I can say, they just have to try it for themselves before they open their mouth.

I was once a mountaineer, and I will always be. See you on the top!

Philippine Cadet on Japanese Soil (Part 4)

2005-03-13T11:17:00.000+09:00

Winter Ski Training (ako yung 173)

For a person born and raised in a warm, tropical country like the Philippines, having the chance to ski (for free!) is an opportunity of a lifetime.

When I was a second year cadet, our batch went to a ski resort in Nagano Prefecture, somewhere to the north of Tokyo. A week of "training" (or should I say, just playing) away from the Academy grounds served both as a training and a way to release the stress and tensions piled up.

You just wake up in the morning, eat breakfast, and off you go! It was more of a gimmick than of a training. After skiing for one day, everyone gets back to their own billeting area and take a rest, eat dinner, sleep. A week of this makes you not want to go back to the "real life" as a cadet.

But, it was a good release. We learned how to ski, we saw the Japan alps, we drank some traditional Japanese soups, and most of all, formed new beer buddies between our classmates.

Philippine Cadet on Japanese Soil (Part 3)

2005-03-12T23:50:00.000+09:00

View From Above

Imagine riding a super-fast rollercoaster without feeling the wind blow in your face, without the raising-on-top-of-your-voice and waving-of-the-hands thing. Can you imagine that?

Now triple it, with a mask on your face which blows a mix of oxygen and nitrogen gas, your G-suit (the one pilots wear while flying) sqeezing air on your legs, thigh and abdomen to prevent blood from going down your feet while maneuvering, a lot of switches in front of you and a stick like in the games.

Imagine flying sideways, seeing the blue sky on your left and at the same time, seeing the also blue sea on your right. You are starting to appreciate the magnificent view of the wide sky when suddenly, the plane suddenly sways 90degrees sideward and you notice the joystick being pulled back fully. The dogfight starts.

Feeling the pressure in all the parts of your body, you struggle to breath normally (which is virtually impossible coz the pressure suddenly drops and the air becomes thin). Thanks to the capability of the mask, it forces air into your nose when this happens. I tried to lift up my right hand while maneuvering but it was so heavy, and as I looked at the G-meter, we were having, on the average, of about 4Gs with the maximum of 8.6Gs (1G means your own weight, 2Gs mean 2 times your weight).

Imagine not knowing anymore where's right or where's left, where's up or where's down. Your hands moving the joystick trying to catch up with your eyes stuck at the enemy plane it maneuvers. You hear beeping sounds everywhere, the heavy breathing of the pilot in front of you, shouting, and shouting, and shouting at each other.

Then suddenly, everything just levels off...you can breathe normally again but still trying to catch your breath which was lost for a while. You can see the horizon parallel to the wings beside you, the clouds covering the very strong rays of the sun. Then you hear a voice which says, "Training's over, let's go home."

A feeling of comfort and sadness, thanking that everything's over and at the same time wanting some more. Taking some pictures of the still water, the clouds, the aircraft beside you with the pilot waving at you, you waving back at him.

Then you see the landing strip... landing gears down, then touchdown.

It was over.

Need some rest

2005-03-03T12:30:00.000+09:00

Pagod.

Puyat.

Eyebugs.

Just finished a week of "pretending-to-study-until-2am" and "waking-up-early-just-to-sleep-again"... hell week is over! What's next... Cross Country! (Somebody kill me please...)

***************

I just got news from home that my nephew, Jaeson's left ring finger was caught in a door it was nearly severed. He was playing with his edler brother, Michael, when that happened. The nail was removed and some of his finger was cut off. I hope he will be fine.

***************

Life Sucks

Hell Week

2005-02-24T09:47:00.000+09:00

Exams week here at the Academy. I have lots of exams, and no time to study. There's this subject about Japan Constitution and the professor is very famous for being "happy" of his image as a "terror" teacher who laughs when he sees failing marks. Hell, I don't even know a thing about the Philippine Constitution and they are asking me to know all those things!?! Well, as I always say... "Life Sucks."

************

I have a new harmonica!!! It was given to my by three of my underclassmen as a gift for "teaching them" things when they were still first years. I'm so touched.... they asked me some time ago kung anong current interest ko. Eh, I was holding a small harmonica at that time. They gave me a veery big one! Super cool!

*************

In a month, I will be a fourth year cadet... which means I'll become a God here (ehehehe). My underclassmen will do favors for me and stuff "Gods" enjoy. But take note, it also comes with a very heavy load... Responsibility.

*************

I want to sleep. I want to rest. I want to climb. I want to dive. I want to love. I can't.

DODOMPA

2005-02-22T17:44:00.000+09:00

This is the Guiness Book of World Records holder of the fastest roller coaster in the world. It's located at the foot of Mt. Fuji in Japan.
Maximum speed 172 km/hr (in 5 sec)
Course length 1189 meters
Ride time 60 sec
Maximum acceleration 4.25 G
Tallest point 52 meters
Maximum drop angle 90 degrees

I want to go home

2005-02-17T21:42:00.000+09:00

Hearing the news last Valentines Day really made me want to go home... and do my job. I don't know how, and I don't know when. But one day, I'm gonna put an end to all of these "stuff". Just give me a good opening...and I'll shoot.

****************

A friend of mine from the Red Cross told me that she was about 5 meters away from the explosion site. All the people were running after the explosion and she also found herself running with them.

I imagine myself on that situation. As a person having some training in first aid, would I try to help out, or as the others did, run? I wouldn't know.

*****************

People have been asking me, "Is your family okay after the explosions?". These Japanese watched about it in the news, and read about it in the dailies. This made me think.... are they "really" okay there? As I have been always telling these Japs, the Philippines is a safe place and the "resistance" you've been hearing is an isolated case. Convincing them to go travel with me to the Philippines will not be that easy after this. Oh well...

******************

Is everyone okay?

Valentines' Mode

2005-02-07T23:39:00.000+09:00

Ready to take the fall, I jumped
The weight of the world I felt on my shoulders
I can’t bear the pain in my heart
When all you said was “thank you”

But being the fool I was before
I can’t explain why I did such a thing but

Let thy be my reminder all my life
To trust love the moment it strikes
And never on this lifetime be in love again
To anyone other than the name within
My mind, my heart, and my soul.

Meeting Pong Pagong

2005-02-04T23:03:00.000+09:00

I intended to publish this blog originally to share some underwater pictures when I dived the seas of Okinawa. I had a picture of me taken with a sea turtle at that time and I made "Meeting Pong Pagong" as the title to this blog.

While searching for some pictures of the "original" Pong Pagong, I found out some things I didn't know about my childhood companion.

As I discovered the reality about Pong Pagong and Kiko Matsing, I was a little bit disheartened... that my childhood idols were originally from Sesame Street (which I also watched as a kid) and was just borrowed to appear in Batibot. They were a key reason why Batibot was made in the first place. It came to a point that Indonesia wanted to have their local version of Batibot and this disappointed Sesame Street. It complicated and eventually, Pong Pagong and Kiko Matsing were returned to their owners...

I watched Batibot earnestly when I was a kid. I knew all the songs and the characters by heart and they were my idols. Batibot taught me a lot of things and when I think of it today, it really affected who I am right now.

Salamat sa inyo, Pong at Kiko.

***I'll share with you anyway the dive pictures***

Aikido

2005-02-03T22:46:00.000+09:00

Aikido

I started Aikido last April 2002 and I have been doing it since then. I suggest you try it... it's a good sport.

Good, Old Angelicum Days

2005-02-01T20:50:00.000+09:00

"Angelicum, Angelicum, Immortal Name Resounding, Proclaim We Now With Mingled Awe......" the song goes on. To us graduates (some didn't), this song we will not forget. Angelicum... a lot of memories.

I remember having "convicted" as one of the boys who made the "bottled smokey mountain" inside the cabinet at the back of the class room (done this with Rene Boy...), strumming some guitar during recess and lunch, and losing a LOT of lunch boxes. I remember also cutting some classes when I don't feel like attending class, coming late for the moderatorship time even though my house is only about 15 minutes away, and lending and borrowing some notes (or test papers..eheheh). I remember playing Cops-n-Robbers and "tatsing bol" (a game similar to dodge ball) with a knotted handkerchief as a ball, and while doing that, tearing my school pants wide open in between. I also experienced shitting in my pants (that's why they called me "Salbaho"). I remember always aiming for the "second-trip" of the school bus just to hang out with my friends, but always fail. A lot of memories.

I had lots of firsts during those days. My first love and heartbreak, my first achievement and failure, and a whole lot more. It makes me want to go back in time just trying to remember those.

Haay... naku.

"...Glorious Name Forever."

some pics here

Philippine Cadet on Japanese Soil (Part 2)

2005-01-31T21:40:00.000+09:00

The Baka Brothers

In Filipino, "Baka" means "Cow".In Japanese, it means "Stupid".

We were called the "Baka Brothers", my foster brother and I. We entered the National Defense Academy and we stayed in the same room, had the same classes, have the same foster parents, and had the same problem... we cannot understand Japanese. If you look at us, it is impossible for us to be brothers. We are complete opposites... height, color, we lived on opposite parts of the world (he in Romania, and me from the Philippines)hence the difference in cultures, we have different tastes in food, different views in life, and the list goes on. But we are brothers, not only because we have the same foster parents, but because we treat each other like real brothers. We look after each other's back, listen to each other's mourns, and laugh at each other's jokes.

For two years, we belonged to the same company and we were shouted at when we made mistakes, we were laughed at when we told jokes, or just stared at because we were just plain strange. For two years, we kept guard of each other's back as we were wading through our plebehood years, and we still are.

Then the time came when we were separated. He was assigned to another batallion which made it hard for us to keep in touch. But still, he was still there when I needed him, and I tried my best to be there for him when he needed me.

We spend the holidays together with our foster parents, we dived together the seas of Okinawa and Kerama Islands, we scaled the mountains and temples of Nikko, we rode together the Guiness Book of World Record holder of the fastest and the longest roller coaster near Mt. Fuji, fished in a boat on the shores of Chiba, and a lot more. We've done a lot of things together, but the one thing we wanted to do but until now failed to do, is to be drunk together!

Only more than a year to go before we graduate, and will go separate ways. But we will be brothers for life. I remember him sending me an email about how he looks up to me, how I taught him things, and how I made him the cadet he is now. But the thing is, I feel the same for him, and I thank him for being a brother to me.

Long live the Baka Brothers!

Philippine Cadet on Japanese Soil (Part 1)

2005-01-28T20:26:00.000+09:00

Courage, Honor, Propriety

We all here of stories about Philippine cadets being sent to American Academies. In fact, one of those lucky cadets became a president of the Philippines (Hon. FVR). They carry with their names the pride and prestige of PMA, as well as the fame that comes from being one of the few. To those who were left behind, they wonder what kind of life these chosen people live. Some feel envy, some feel pride, and some just are apathetic. To those who were chosen to represent the Philippines, they also wonder what kind of life they left behind, and what will become of them in the future. These are the questions that sometimes come to us, the lucky (or in some ways, unlucky), the proud (or sometimes humiliated), and the chosen. I am a Philippine cadet, now on Japanese soil, striving hard to give our country a good name. I will try to share my experiences here thru this blog to let others know our laugher, our tears, our sweat and blood, our hearts. Our tongues might be of foreign land, their faces a little bit yellow, but our hearts are just the same... doing our best, striving for excellence in the preservation of peace.

Wondering

2005-01-26T18:54:00.000+09:00

Have you ever noticed
that the worst way
to miss someone
is when they are
right beside you
and yet you
can never have them?

…when the moment
you can’t feel them
under you fingertips
you miss them?

Have you ever wondered
which hurts the most:
saying something and wishing
you had not, or
saying nothing and wishing
you had?

I guess the most important things
are the hardest ones to say.
They are the things
you get ashamed of
because words diminish them.
Words shrink things
that seemed timeless
when they were in your head-
to no more than living size
when they are brought out…

Have you ever decided
not to become a couple
because you were
so afraid of losing
what you already had
with that person?

Your heart decides
who it likes
and who it doesn’t.
You can’t tell you heart
what to do.
It does it on its own…
when you least suspect it,
or even when
you don’t want it to.

Have you ever wanted
to love someone
with everything you had,
but that other person
was too afraid to let you?
Too many of us stay walled
because we are too afraid
to care too much…
for fear that the other person
does not care as much,
or at all.

Have you ever loved someone
and they had absolutely
no idea whatsoever?
Or fell for your best friend
in the entire world,
and then sat around
and watched him fall
for someone else?

Have you ever denied your
feelings for someone
because your fear of rejection
was too hard to handle?

We tell lies when we are afraid…
afraid of what we don’t know,
afraid of what others will think,
afraid of what will be found out
about us.
But everytime we tell a lie…
the thing we fear grows stronger.

Life is all about risks
and it requires you to jump.
Don’t be a person
who has to look back
and wonder what they would have
achieved if they just weren’t
too afraid to try.
Live your days as if
they were your last…
experience everything.
Laugh and smile and cry and learn…
And dance like nobody’s watchingand love like it’s never gonna hurt.

my first post

2005-01-26T08:50:00.000+09:00

BLOG. I don't know anything about blogs. I once heard that a blog is like a daily diary posted on the internet. But it can be read by other people so there goes secrecy of the diary. They also say that it is a good way to keep in touch with your friends... that those friends network thingie is out and blogging is in.

I once thought that blogging is not for me... noting that my english is deteriorating for staying here in Japan for some time. Except for my very close friends, my life is a mystery...even for me. I told myself that there is no way I'm gonna open up to the people around me, especially here in the intenet. But everyone does it... and they seem to enjoy and be contented in it. I told myself, why not give it a shot? Why not try to open up, maybe bit by bit, of myself to people around me. It is hard to share yourself to others if you, yourself doesn't know yourself. Maybe by opening up to others will show the way to discovery of one's self.... hmmmn....

So here am I... stepping into a path unknown to me... to a path I once told myself not to take. What to write, what to write, I do not know.